Video chat etiquette: how not to get skipped

Make a good first impression

• Show your face. A ceiling, a dark room or a hand over the camera gets skipped every time.
• Light from the front. A lamp behind your screen beats sitting in front of a bright window.
• Camera at eye level. Prop up your phone or laptop so you're not looking down at it.
• Smile and say hi first. Waiting for the other person to start rarely works.

During the chat

• Listen more than you talk. Follow-up questions make people feel heard.
• Keep background noise down. Headphones help a lot.
• Don't multitask on camera. Scrolling your phone mid-chat is a fast way to lose someone.
• Keep it respectful. Flirting is fine when it's mutual; pressure never is.
• Respect boundaries. If someone doesn't want to share something, move on.

Stuck for things to say? Use our 50 conversation starters.

What not to do

• Don't ask for social media, phone numbers or personal details straight away.
• Don't push anyone to undress or do anything on camera. It breaks our Community Guidelines.
• Don't record people without their clear permission.
• Don't send links.
• Don't take it personally when someone skips you.

Ending a chat politely

You never owe anyone a conversation, but a quick goodbye goes a long way when a chat has been friendly:

• "This was fun. I'm going to keep exploring. Have a good night!"
• "Nice talking to you. Good luck with [the thing they mentioned]!"

If someone is rude or breaks the rules, skip the goodbye: press Next and use Report.

Etiquette is safety too

Good habits protect you as well as others. Keep personal details out of the conversation, assume you could be recorded, and never send money. Our random video chat safety guide covers the rest.

Frequently asked questions